Selamat Hari Raya Aidiladha

Selamat meraikan hari raya aidiladha kepada semua..Raya korban tahun ni aku beraya kat Johor dengan adik aku..Adik ipar & anak sedara aku pun dan exited nunggu aku..Ni raya last sebelum aku menamatkan zaman bujang, sepatutnya aku patut berada di kampung..tapi takpela..raya kat mane2 pun same je...Kepada mak & adik2 aku..Selamat hari raya Aidiladha..Ampun dan maaf atas segala dosa2 along..halalkan semuanya..I love u all so so so much..Along doakan mak sentiasa happy walaupun kita tak dapat beraya bersama...Love u mak..

Life must must must....goes on...

Tak tahu nak mula dari mane, since semua org dah bertanya2 apakah puncanya, secara ringkasnya aku akan ceritakan serba sedikitla..Semuanya bermula bulan lepas apabila my very so called first loved datang ke rumah my parents untuk chit chat or somethhing yang aku tak tahu...sebab aku dah dekat nak 2 bulan tak balik temerloh..One of my friends telling me that dia berhajat untuk meminang aku..dan dia jugak akuinya..malangnya aku dah bertunang....huhhhh...adakah aku masih ada hati kat dia?hehehehe..tentulah tak..sebabnya aku dah ada someone yang betul2 menepati piawaian aku...My ex ni pun, bukannya calang2 orang...he's Physiotherapist...skang tengah futher study kat UK..Tengah siapakan thesis akhir PHD..So, apa yang u all tak tahu, dia ni duda...anak dua..katanya divorce sebab his wife is cheating on him...

So, in order nak dapatkan hak penjagaan anak, dia harus ada isteri & katanya akulah calon yang paling sesuai untuk dia dan anak2..huhhh..biar betik...Masa bulan puasa 2 tahun lepas, dia pernah bawk anak dia yang masa tu, berumur dalam 3 bulan, sangat baby lagi, datang ke rumah aku..WITHOUT HIS WIFE...Masa tu dia ckp wife dia keje, dia terpaksa beraya dengan anak sahaja kat umah mak dia kat terengganu..Aku dengan mak aku pun layan jela...nak buat air tak bole sebab bulan puasa..jadi borak2 kosong jek..2 minggu lepas ,masa dia call aku brla dia cite perkara sebenarnya..rupanya masa tu, dia bwk lari anak dia,pptla pagi sgt dia sampai..pas sahur kot dia bertolak...emmm..kiranya nak bawak anak dia jumpa bakal mak tirinya la tuhhhh...hehhehe..

So, my fiance tahula my ex ni datang umah..kebetulan masa mak aku bgtahu kisah my ex datang ni, aku tengah mkn dengan my fiance....Apa lagi berasap atas bawahla dia....aku cool jek..sebab itu semua cite lame...perasaan tu pun dah takde...lebih2 lagi dia dah kawin dengan org lain..adik2 ngan mak aku kata, bapak aku suka sangat berborak dengan si dia ni..my ex ni very educated, jadi bykla idea yang diaorg share kot...

Bila dah my fiance tahu, bermulalah banyak persoalan dalam kepala dia ni..mulalah dia pikir bukan2...Dia ingat aku curangla...itulah..inilah..padahal itu semua celitaaa lama..padahal aku tak pernah terpikir pun nak sambung apa yang terputus dulu....tak mungkin....So..malas nak cite panjang2 lagi..yang lain2 tu korang buatla andaian sendiri k..

Tapi sekarang my fiance dah getting better..ada insiden lain pulak yang berlaku di antara aku dengan dia..terlalu complicated utk dicerita...biarlah semuanya dirahsiakan bagi menjaga maruah semua pihak..Yang penting, janganlah percaya kat sape2 terutamanya our loves one...Once they break our heart, memang sukar kita nak bina balik kepercayaan itu...Yang penting, bercintalah berpada2...Jangan terlalu taksub...Ape2 jadi akakkkkk jugak yang rugi...

50/50

Im not that kind of person yang bole memaafkan orang senang2..Bile kita terlalu mudah memaafkan org lain, the tendency utk org tu memijak2 dan memainkan kita kembali sangat tinggi...Luka di hati ni masih pedih, walaupun zahirnya tak de orang yang nampak keperitan yang aku lalui ini..Adakah aku terpaksa mengorbankan diri sendiri demi menjaga maruah kedua2 keluarga.....ahhhh..terlalu berat beban ini..tak tertanggung...

Perlu ke aku memaafkan dirinya, dan berlalu seolah2 tiada apa2 yang berlaku sedangkan im suffered inside..2nd chance is always an option especially for men..huhhhh sungguh mudah...tapi aku tak semudah itu..kenapa di saat2 ini masalah ini berlaku..sungguh tak adil bagiku....seharusnya bukan aku yang harus merendah diri, tunduk dan beralah....im not the one who create this problem..

GOD...what should i do...im totally lost..im phsically and mentally weak..Hendaknya ... jgnla masalah ini terbawa2 dan effect sampai ke kelas..jgnla student2 & kwn2 aku jadi mangsa...aku terlalu sedih + stress...please pray for me...

Andai itu takdirnya...

Ujian datang bertimpa2 from my side and his side untill last night i decided to end up everything..Tak tahula keputusan yang aku buat ni berasaskan win win situation ataupun win loose situation...Ahhhh..biarkanlah yang kalah itu di pihakku...Kalo difikir2, aku berjaya mendidik anak2 muridku sampi berjaya...lebihhhhh berjaya dari aku sekarang...namun malangnya aku sendiri tak berjaya nak mencorakkan hidupku sendiri...

Bila ujian itu datang, terlalu rumit untuk dikongsikan bersama orang lain..mungkin memendam rasa adalah lebih baik dari meluahkannya..Thanks God, punca masalah ini dapat dikenalpasti dari awal...Kadang2 sebagai perempuan, kita memang diberikan instinct...kita akan tahu bila something is wrong somewhere, tapi kenapa kadang2 kita juga terpaksa pretend yang semuanya goes well....Banyak hati yang perlu di jaga...Yaaaaaaaa...aku akui perkara ni memakan diri ku.....

Change your thinking.... (Must Read)

It will take just 37 seconds to read this and change your thinking..

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window.

The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation..

Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and colour of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every colour and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene.. One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by.

Although the other man could not hear the band - he could see it in his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days, weeks and months passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.

He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed. It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said, 'Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.'

Epilogue:

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations.

Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.

If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy.

'Today is a gift, that is why it is called The Present .'

The origin of this letter is unknown, but it brings good luck to everyone who passes it on.

Do not keep this letter.

I pray you will forward it to all your friends to whom you wish God's blessings.

Di saat2 ini aku sangat rindukan mak....

Only God knows what i'm feeling inside...

A Song for Mama

You taught me everything
And everything you've given me
I always keep it inside
You're the driving force in my life
There isn't anything
Or anyone that I can be
And it just wouldn't feel right
If I didn't have you by my side
You were there for me to love and care for me
When skies were grey
Whenever I was down
You were always there to comfort me
And no one else can be what you have been to me
You will always be you always will be the girl
In my life for all times

Mama, you know I love you
Oh you know I love you
Mama, you're the queen of my heart
Your love is like
Tears from the stars
Mama, I just want you to know
Lovin' you is like food to my soul
Yes it is

You're always down for me
Have always been around for me even when I was bad
You showed me right from my wrong
Yes you did
And you took up for me
When everyone was downin' me
You always did understand
You gave me strength to go on
There was so many times
Looking back when I was so afraid
And then you come to me
And say to me I can face anything
And no one else can do
What you have done for me
You'll always be
You will always be the girl in my life

Never gonna go a day without you
Fills me up just thinking of you
I'll never go a day without my mama

Yes you are

Mid term exam HRM result dah keluar....

Congratulations...kepada student2 HRM aku yang dapat marks yang bgs dalam mid term exam minggu lepas...so far, ramai yang dapat marks yang bgs2...tapi ada jugak my target student yang tak lepas...itulah, kadang2 kita hanya merancang, tapi DIA yang tentukan semuanya....kepada yang berjaya, tahniah di ucapkan....usaha anda sgt2 berbaloi tetapi...kepada yang kurang markahnya....masih ada banyak masa dan ruang untuk memperbaiki diri anda...u know who u are : )..But then...u all semua tetap menjadi pojaan hatiku...

MQA punya cerita

Seperti yang dicanang2kan sebelum ni, Semalam MQA datang buat visit kat cni....punyala takutnya sampai tak bole tido mlm sebelum tu..Bayangkan aku tido dah pukul 2 pagi..dok prepare bahan2 nak ajar dalam kelas lagi....yela..ada class observation..diaorg nak tgk aku mengajar dan interview aku sekali....dalam kul 6 pagi dah siap2 nak ke opis pulak...diaorg dtg 2 hari..semalam dengan hari ni...memang tak bole main2 punya dgn diaorg..diaorg memg strict habis...memang diaorg ni insan2 terpilih..yang sgt pandai dlam bidang masing2...semua teori dalam kepala...fuhhhh...bilela aku nak sampai ke tahap itu?????dalam kul 12 semalam, aku, kak oni, kak selvi & encik nizar di interview in group..memang lega banyak sgt...panel ada 3 orang...so far ok, tapi memang strict..dah memang tgs diaorg pun...mcm dok dlm bilik soal siasat pun ada rasanya...pum pam pum pam..dah dekat nak nak pukul 1...pukul 2 aku ada mock teaching..berkejar pulak ke tingkat 4...siap2kan semua..fotostat bahan2 bukti...huhuhu..dalam kelas, trus briefing kat budak2 5 orang tu..diaorg memang sporting habis..memang boleh dapat anugerah pelakon2 pembantu terbaik...sebabnya anugerah pelakon terbaik adalah jatuh kepadaaaaaaaaaaaaa lecturernya lahhhhh...hheheehe...alhamdulillah...panel2 tu masuk pun dah pukul 3 petang..sejam lewat..dalam 5 minit sahaja diaorg observed aku.....agaknya dia tgk aku mcm konpiden jek....So, thank you so so so much kepada student2 aku yang sgt2 memberi kerjsama yang tak berbelah bahagi kepada aku...thanks Z, LOONG, HANA, PAT, & MAGESWARY...dan tak lupa jugak kepada kwn2 dan boss aku yang memang gile babi punya supportive...u all memang yang terbaik...love u all so much...

Good Luck to all my dear student

Anyway..kepada semua student2 HRM and OB dan juga kepada student2 yang pernah saya ajar mahupun yang saya tak pernah ajar...gOOD Luck for ur mid term exam... Buatla sehabis baik...Anggap jela mid term test ni mcm kuiz yang kita buat dalam kelas sebelum2 ni...I know u all bole buat yang terbaik..Saya doakan yang terbaik..saya telah berikan segala yang terbaik dan kini terserahlah kepada anda semua...Love u all so so so much...Good luck...

8.20 p.m ...aku masih di pejabat....I really2 need R&R

Huhuhuhu...punyala hebat penangan MQA...Dari 8 pagi tadi sampai 8 malam ni, tak balik2 lagi aku..apala nak jadi dengan hidup aku ni..semuanya dah lintang pukang, tunggang langgang...Nasibla esok aku amik half day...Yes Yes Yes...tak sabar rasanya aku nak bercuti...dapatlah hilangkan sejenak semak kat otak ni ... sekejap pun dah memadai... Stressnya wei...nak kena buat mock teaching depan panel2 tu lagi, interview pasal subject...macm nak mintak keje je...huhuhuhu...hahhhhhhhhhhh stress...Aku betul2 perlukan R&R minggu...Rehat & Rawat..serawat2nya...parahnya luka di otak ku ni..Harap2 takdela di saat2 akhir aku kena tundakan percutian aku ni...bukan nak ke mana pun..nak keluar je dari ibu kota yang semak ni..Doakan aku dapat ketenangan yang secukupnya ya...

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